Ministry of Truth passes Respect for Marriage Act

The Ministry of Truth rubber stamped a new law last night they’re calling the “Respect for Marriage Act.” 

Celebrations took place all over the country, though some were concerned that the bill would impede their religious liberty.  

“Fears for religious liberty are completely unfounded. The RFMA (Respect for Marriage Act) is simply codifying what is already practically the law—it changes nothing, and so religious liberty will remain,” a spokesperson for the Ministry said. “At the same time, the RFMA is a monumental historical moment and landmark breakthrough in LGBQT legislation. This truly changes everything!” 

The Respect for Marriage Act, which says marriage must be recognized between two people of the same sex, replaces the earlier Respect for Marriage Act, which said marriage must not be recognized between two people of the same sex. And while the earlier RFMA was respecting marriage because marriage is definitionally a man and a woman, the new RFMA is respecting marriage because marriage is definitionally not a man and a woman.

“We’re always committed to making the truth as clear and transparent as possible,” the spokesperson said. “So, we thought it best to use the same name for the exact opposite bill.”

At press time, the Ministry announced plans to pass a Religious Freedom Restoration Act.